Add Friends On Facebook
By
Alfian Adi Saputra
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Thursday, July 5, 2018
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Add Friend
I absolutely love speaking about Facebook rules. It constantly appears to be a questionable topic-- and for excellent factor. For the life of me I cannot figure out why individuals put so much stock into their Facebook life.
Add Friends On Facebook
" Did you see my status today? Why didn't you see my status? When will you Like my status?"
Yeesh, enough currently!
I even wrote a short article called "Real" Friends vs. Facebook Pals that discussed how developed a few of us get about adding "pals" to our network.
However adding good friends to your list is all a part of the Facebook fun, right? Incorrect!
It's not a race, it's not a competition, and you shouldn't be too eager to send out a friend request to somebody you simply satisfied or only talked with for seven seconds in the elevator. So, before you spend hours waiting anxiously in front of your computer system to see if Beth-- who you have never spoken with but see in the hallway every day - will accept your demand, let's draw back the veil of Facebook friendship.
Here are my top 3 Quick and Dirty Tips on how quickly you can legitimately pal someone on Facebook:
Tip 1: The New Love
Okay class, by a show of hands, how many of you have stalked somebody on Facebook?
Come on now, I do not see each and every single hand up ... since it should be.
Facebook stalking (in the safe/non-threatening sense) is when you look up a total stranger, or someone you loosely know, and take a self-guided tour of their page. The picture album entitled "Summer season 2013"-- do not mind if I do!
This particularly takes place when you will go on a date with somebody or have actually just gone a very first date. So as you're exchanging stories about what you want to do on the weekends, an idea comes to mind, "Should I pal them?" Then you teeter back and forth, uncertain if you ought to make the very first move. It resembles a social game of ping pong with one side of your brain saying, "Naturally! Go all out, they'll like it!" and the opposite saying, "Wait ... I'll look like a stalker."
After a date is over, you normally have a smart idea of whether or not there will be a second date. And therein lies your answer. If you can see this individual being a "good friend"-- either platonically or with benefits - then it's a yes. Nevertheless, if you believe to yourself, "I'm not exactly sure I wish to see this individual once again," then the answer is most likely "No" to adding them as a Facebook pal.
Let's be honest, you won't get an award for having 10,000 friends on Facebook, and you will not be tossed out for having just 10. If you're fretted about whether to extend a pal request or not, ensure that you can truly call them a pal in the first location (or at least that they're someone with pal capacity). When you add a person to your facebook circle, they'll see whatever you do. They'll learn if you're "in a relationship" and if you put "it's made complex" as your status while dating them. They have access to your every move ... awwwwkward.
So if you see this going for more than a few dates or staying "just friends," then go for it. Nevertheless, if there is any doubt, do not feel obligated to accept their request or extend one yourself. You do not owe a stranger a window into your social life.
Tip 2: The Office "Good friend".
Facebook in the workplace is like diving in an old boat wreck-- you never understand exactly what freaky things you'll find around each dark turn when you dig deep enough.
Take one Modern Good manners Guy Facebook friend, Mike, who asked me about friending a good young female called Stephanie, who operates in the cube throughout from him. He said she is funny, constantly happy to assist out a fellow coworker, never complains about having to work late, and is typically the best coworker. However, the something Mike didn't mention was that he's only been at this task for six days and has yet to utter a single word to Miss Wonderful. He looked her up on Facebook (Stalker, table for one!) and it turns out they have a lot in typical. Oh, yeah, except for one minor information like really being good friends!
The workplace is no place to take risks with Facebook. If you are not good friends in reality, you cannot be pals on Facebook. It's that basic. So in Mike's case, I encouraged him to hold off till he had at least one conversation with Stephanie where they connected on a non-work issues such as food, TV, movies, pastimes, etc. This is where a real friendship comes about. Not simply speaking about spreadsheets or conferences.
I told him that if Stephanie got his good friend request without ever having contact with him previously, she would more than likely think 3 things:.
- Mike - who is Mike? Oh, wait, is it that person across from me? We're not good friends.
- Wait a 2nd, did he look my name up on Facebook just to find me? Ewww.
- If I do not accept he'll understand due to the fact that we see each other every day and it will be unpleasant. I do not like him for putting me in this position.
See where I'm going here?
If you are truly itching to make the "friend" relocation, start a pleasant discussion on a routine basis - face to face. As you do this, raise something about Facebook like, "Oh, examine this out, my pal just posted the funniest image of his young puppy on Facebook." Now we're getting somewhere!
Then, while on the subject of Facebook, feel free to ask about whether the person is on it or not. See how they respond and aim to read it from there. Continue even more if-- and only if-- you feel there is an actual friendship besides, "Can you inform me where the meeting room is?".
Tip 3: Crazy Loved ones.
Here's a few realities about social media:.
- 60% of 50-60-year-olds are active on social media.
- in the 65+ bracket, 43% are utilizing social media.
So there must be no surprise that Facebook specifically is no longer a "kid thing." Many older individuals are reaching out to loved ones of all ages to connect and catch up on the newest news in their life. And that's excellent!
However, let's take a look at the case of one Modern Manners Guy fan named Angela. She is a passionate "Facebooker" and shares whatever with her pals (her words). She jokes that she actually overshares sometimes. At a recent household gathering, Angela reconnected with a cousin who is 10 years older. Angela got home and sent out a friend demand, her cousin accepted, however things went south a week later. Turns out, her cousin was not a huge fan of Angela's way of life. This cousin would send out messages telling Angela that she disagreed with her choices, her images, her status updates. All of a sudden, Angela ended up being Relative Opponent # 1, all since she posted bathing match pictures from her trip to Mexico.
The important things about relatives is that they have the tendency to get a free pass when it concerns sharing their viewpoints of you. Pals may keep back, or be more safeguarded with their feelings, but family members - man, oh man, they have less of a buffer (which, by the way, I do not think is fair - but that's a subject for another episode).
For Angela, this is a case of not appropriately determining your relationship with the person before sending a pal demand. Friending someone on Facebook sounds very easy: "I like this individual-- why not include them?" However, we have the tendency to forget that not everybody will appreciate our funny bone or what we share. When we good friend someone prior to finding out whether or not they're on our wavelength, we take the danger of upseting them if they don't share our views. Constantly remember that your innocent post might not be so innocent to somebody with a different outlook on life. But now that you're "friends," they have the right to comment on it.