Add Facebook Friends
By
pusahma dua
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Thursday, April 19, 2018
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Add Friend
I definitely like discussing Facebook etiquette. It always appears to be a controversial topic-- and for excellent factor. For the life of me I cannot figure out why individuals put so much stock into their Facebook life.
Add Facebook Friends
" Did you see my status today? Why didn't you see my status? When will you Like my status?"
Yeesh, enough currently!
I even wrote a short article called "Genuine" Pals vs. Facebook Pals that talked about how worked up a few of us get about including "good friends" to our network.
However including pals to your list is all a part of the Facebook enjoyable, right? Wrong!
It's not a race, it's not a competition, and you should not be too eager to send a friend demand to someone you simply fulfilled or only talked to for 7 seconds in the elevator. So, prior to you invest hours waiting anxiously in front of your computer system to see if Beth-- who you have actually never talked to but see in the hallway every day - will accept your demand, let's draw back the veil of Facebook friendship.
Here are my leading 3 Quick and Dirty Tips on how rapidly you can legitimately buddy someone on Facebook:
Tip 1: The New Romance
Okay class, by a program of hands, the number of of you have stalked somebody on Facebook?
Begin now, I do not see each hand up ... because it needs to be.
Facebook stalking (in the safe/non-threatening sense) is when you look up a complete stranger, or somebody you loosely understand, and take a self-guided tour of their page. The image album entitled "Summer season 2013"-- do not mind if I do!
This particularly occurs when you will go on a date with somebody or have actually just gone a first date. So as you're exchanging stories about what you want to do on the weekends, a thought enters your mind, "Should I pal them?" Then you teeter backward and forward, unsure if you need to make the first move. It resembles a social video game of ping pong with one side of your brain saying, "Of course! Go all out, they'll enjoy it!" and the opposite saying, "Wait ... I'll appear like a stalker."
After a date is over, you typically have a smart idea of whether or not there will be a second date. And therein lies your answer. If you can see this person being a "pal"-- either platonically or with advantages - then it's a yes. Nevertheless, if you think to yourself, "I'm not sure I wish to see this person again," then the answer is most likely "No" to adding them as a Facebook pal.
Let's be truthful, you won't get an award for having 10,000 friends on Facebook, and you will not be kicked out for having just 10. If you're fretted about whether to extend a good friend demand or not, make certain that you can really call them a friend in the first location (or at least that they're somebody with buddy capacity). When you include an individual to your facebook circle, they'll see whatever you do. They'll learn if you're "in a relationship" and if you put "it's made complex" as your status while dating them. They have access to your every move ... awwwwkward.
So if you see this choosing more than a couple of dates or remaining "simply friends," then go for it. Nevertheless, if there is any doubt, do not feel obligated to accept their request or extend one yourself. You do not owe a complete stranger a window into your social life.
Tip 2: The Office "Friend".
Facebook in the office resembles diving in an old boat wreck-- you never know exactly what freaky things you'll discover around each dark turn when you dig deep enough.
Take one Modern Manners Man Facebook friend, Mike, who asked me about friending a nice young lady called Stephanie, who works in the cube across from him. He said she is funny, constantly going to assist a fellow colleague, never complains about having to work late, and is typically the best coworker. However, the one thing Mike didn't point out was that he's just been at this task for six days and has yet to utter a single word to Miss Terrific. He looked her up on Facebook (Stalker, table for one!) and it ends up they have a lot in typical. Oh, yeah, except for one minor information like really being buddies!
The office is no location to take risks with Facebook. If you are not friends in reality, you can't be friends on Facebook. It's that basic. So in Mike's case, I encouraged him to hold back until he had at least one conversation with Stephanie where they connected on a non-work concerns such as food, TV, films, pastimes, etc. This is where a genuine relationship comes about. Not simply discussing spreadsheets or conferences.
I told him that if Stephanie received his good friend demand without ever having contact with him previously, she would more than likely believe 3 things:.
- Mike - who is Mike? Oh, wait, is it that person throughout from me? We're not pals.
- Wait a 2nd, did he look my name up on Facebook simply to find me? Ewww.
- If I don't accept he'll understand due to the fact that we see each other every day and it will be uncomfortable. I don't like him for putting me in this position.
See where I'm going here?
If you are really itching to make the "buddy" relocation, begin a pleasant conversation on a routine basis - face to face. As you do this, bring up something about Facebook like, "Oh, inspect this out, my buddy just posted the funniest photo of his pup on Facebook." Now we're getting somewhere!
Then, while on the topic of Facebook, don't hesitate to ask about whether the person is on it or not. See how they respond and try to read it from there. Proceed further if-- and only if-- you feel there is a real relationship other than, "Can you inform me where the meeting room is?".
Tip 3: Crazy Family members.
Here's a couple of realities about social networks:.
- 60% of 50-60-year-olds are active on social media.
- in the 65+ bracket, 43% are using social media.
So there must be not a surprise that Facebook especially is no longer a "kid thing." Numerous older people are reaching out to family members of any ages to link and catch up on the most recent news in their life. And that's terrific!
However, let's take a look at the case of one Modern Manners Man fan called Angela. She is an avid "Facebooker" and shares everything with her good friends (her words). She jokes that she in fact overshares often. At a current household event, Angela reconnected with a cousin who is 10 years older. Angela got home and sent out a pal demand, her cousin accepted, but things went south a week later on. Turns out, her cousin was not a huge fan of Angela's lifestyle. This cousin would send messages telling Angela that she disagreed with her choices, her photos, her status updates. Suddenly, Angela became Relative Opponent # 1, all since she published swimsuit images from her journey to Mexico.
The thing about family members is that they tend to get a free pass when it concerns sharing their opinions of you. Pals might keep back, or be more guarded with their sensations, but loved ones - guy, oh man, they have less of a buffer (which, by the way, I do not believe is reasonable - however that's a topic for another episode).
For Angela, this is a case of not appropriately measuring your relationship with the person prior to sending a friend demand. Friending somebody on Facebook sounds really easy: "I like this person-- why not add them?" Nevertheless, we tend to forget that not everyone will appreciate our sense of humor or what we share. When we friend somebody before discovering whether they're on our wavelength, we take the danger of upseting them if they don't share our views. Constantly keep in mind that your innocent post may not be so innocent to somebody with a different outlook on life. And now that you're "pals," they have the right to talk about it.